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Ugly Gardens of Iraq

This is part of The Ugly Gardens Project. Go there for an explanation of why this page is here!

Due to current events in the Middle East, we decided to do a topical Ugly Gardens™ project. The American-led military forces have been kind enough, now on two wars occasions, to give the Iraqi people an opportunity to resculpt their gardens. We decided to look at some of the Ugly Gardens that now exist on the other side of the fence.

Warning: large page with lots of large(ish) images! Some may find this page offensive or upsetting. We don't want to trivialise war - this is a satirical criticism of the attacks on Iraq.


Aerial shot 1

  1. This garden sports a feature people seem to be fond of in Bedford - redundant diagonal paths. Maybe they're there to give people a sporting chance of avoiding unexploded cluster bombs that no doubt decorate the end of the lawn?
  2. Rooftop gardens! We thought these went out of vogue with the 1980s, but apparently they're alive and kicking in Iraq! I know it can be difficult to keep up with the trends when you have corposes clogging the streets, and people fleeing in terror from your despotic government AND air strikes, but come on - make some effort! At least have some '90s-style decking!
  3. People of Iraq - you've got to try to be creative with your bomb craters. Though they are difficult to plan ahead for, once you're stuck with them, you could at least try to make an interesting water feature out of them, or maybe put a pretty picket fence around them, to say: this is MY bomb crater!.

Aerial shot 2

  1. The bombs have already done you a favour in destroying that horrible maisonette, with the silly cross-shaped garden in the middle, so we're unsure why little more has been done with the site. We think we can see a solitary tree (bottom left corner), but that's hardly foliage, is it now?
  2. Either this site is untouched, or these creative fellows have seized on the pattern of a bomb site and made an interesting pavement arrangement in the shape of a star. Perhaps in the middle they've placed a daisy cutter on a pedestal? It'd certainly make a striking feature to show off to the governent-sanctioned art critics!

Aerial shot 3

  1. These people have made a water feature out of a bomb crater. In fact, they've gone the whole hog here and made it into a swimming pool, complete with diving board! But come on now - what serious athlete is going to train in a circular pool? A little effort could have been made to sort out the shape! We also don't see much evidence of tiling - a must for those deckchairs!
  2. We appreciate that this ground probably covers the graves of people killed by bombs, bullets, torture, starvation, radiation from depleted uranium and sanctions, but you've got to do something to it! People are soon going to have to live here, having been forced out of the decimated, radioactive cities, and you don't want them fleeing one hellhole only to find another!

Aerial shot 4
A landscaper surveys his work.